Wednesday, 18 April 2012


I, Red Handed, am pleased to bring to your notice the fact that at the completion of 10 days commencing tomorrow, my college life would come to its much awaited death. This marks the end of the 5 years of rotting in a University which took me in with the intention of transforming me into a budding lawyer. I will not be using the words ‘graduating from the University’ since considering the gas I am filling my semester exam answer sheets with, a supplementary seems not unusual. But then again, my mother prays to the good Lord twice a day, so graduating within the stipulated time can still be hoped for. 

The question is whether my father is ready to accept the turbulent change that his daughter has succumbed to. His daughter did become the confident woman he wanted her to be, but along with that she also changed into a cunning person with the ability to fake concern for those she wants erased from the face of earth. Her innocence has been brutally stomped on in the course of 5 years resulting in her judging the world under a microscope. My mother is too preoccupied with celebrating the fact that her whale like daughter is now 10 kgs down and hope is there regarding her getting a number of proposals once she is registered in the Kerala Matrimony. 

But it burns me to inform you that at the end of the 10 days starting tomorrow, my status would be ‘unemployed fresh law graduate’. Yes people do pass out of National Law Universities without a J.O.B. The term ‘honours’ fixed to the end of BA.LL.B seems as useless as the degree itself. Red Handed doesn’t want to wear the black robe and frequent the courts, though becoming a divorce lawyer seems to be a lucrative profession.  She also did not sit for the University placements for she doesn’t consider herself a corporate bug ready to work constrained to the shackles of time. Father was proud of her for he has divine plans which includes her becoming a district judge or an IRS officer and whooshing down the city roads in a ‘gadi with the lal batti’ as my mother defines it. Doomsday is visible to me. Even I am not ready to accept the fact that at this point, I am pretty much lost. Mr Father has allowed me a vacation of one month once I reach back home, which he says I should use fruitfully to determine ‘What’s next?’ 


1)      Job Hunting- I shall bury myself between the pages of ‘Employment News’  and would adhere to the plan set out by my wise and diligent father i.e write all the Government exams possible including the much feared district judge exam. I once asked him “Why do you think, I am capable enough to become a judge?” To this he replied instantly “My child, Lord Hanuman did not know of his abilities and his destiny. He had to be reminded”. I think by saying that, he either called me a monkey or a woman with potential she is unaware of.

2)      Further studies- Like a nerd who she truly isn’t though sometimes wishes she was, she will donate two more years of her life to study L.L.M which will actually grant her two more years to live on her Dad’s money. But 5 yrs of law has successfully numbed my grey cells and I do not think my nerves can take any more of it. 

3)      Marry- I am jealous of the girls, whose parents are devoting much of their time finding a rich groom for their daughters. All you need to do is step out of college and suddenly you are a ripe fruit in the market which has to be bought and eaten by probable customers before it rots. In my case, my parents won’t get me hitched unless I have a well paid job. This decision of theirs which till now was considered by me to be a blessing is suddenly a hindrance between me and a rich man whose life I can successfully ruin. But then again, I am no housewife material and the institution of marriage disgusts me.

      Since all of the above options are not satisfactory and fulfilling, I have decided to join a gym once I get back home, shed the kilos preventing the ex-whale from becoming a mermaid and wait till God gives up and finally tells me what I am meant to do. Considering my life till now, I am sure God would be easy on me. My mother prays!
      P.S- The above post describes the reason why I was off the picture for exactly one month. Final Semester keeps you busy not only with the big books, but the extra partying and the farewell extravaganza. Sorry for being MIA and not visiting your blogs. Exempt me for some more days.